sarcastic-snowflake:

So every morning I get off the train and start my 20 minute walk to work, and there’s this guy who’s always like 3 steps ahead of me and always beats me to the street corner bc I get stopped by the light and he passes it. but today I was ahead of him for the first time and he RUNS in front of me, turns around and goes “I’ve been winning for 2 months now, can’t stop now, have a good day, see you tomorrow.”  tmrw I swear i’m wearing running shoes to work. 

(via ninjaatmidnight)

ejakeulati0n:

dude i’m gonna frickin hold your hand so hard it’s gonna blow your mind with how hecka rad my affection is

(via candycanelame)

offisir:

do u ever just cum and it ain’t great and ur like “ok that one was super lame”

(via pizza)

and-then-sara:

comedycentral:

"You’re not supposed to eat Americone Dream after sex. You’re supposed to eat it during sex. That’s what the waffle cone pieces are for, they’re ribbed for your pleasure.” -Stephen Colbert

Americone is actually really good though.

(via jensenfleetwood)

"One day, whether you
are 14,
28 
or 65

you will stumble upon
someone who will start
a fire in you that cannot die.

However, the saddest,
most awful truth
you will ever come to find––

is they are not always
with whom we spend our lives."
- Beau Taplin, ("The Awful Truth")

(Source: afadthatlastsforever, via ninjaatmidnight)

thehemings:

getting-fit-staying-fab:

d-elenda:

can you imagine if someone sent you a list of all the reason why they love you

well wouldn’t that be the shortest list in the world

Yeah it would because all they would write is

  • everything

Do you even know how smooth that was

(Source: l0stkeys, via ninjaatmidnight)

9pm / 7am / 9pm

(Source: danielradcliffes, via inactiveblogger)

detective-comics:

Justice Magazine: Issues April - Febuary | Stanley 'Artgerm' Lau

(via genericfangirlnumber4)

so-uncivilised:

maxeth:

what the fuck is going on

You’re right!

(Source: oldspice, via ninjaatmidnight)